The Official Monster Raving Loony Party have announced their party leader Howling Laud Hope as their candidate in the upcoming Chester by-election on 1st December.
Last week they took to social media to announce tv presenter Patrick Christys would be their candidate.
However this decision was apparently reversed, with an announcement via Twitter on Friday (4th November) that Mr Christys had been expelled from the party.
Explaining why, the post stated: “The reason for Patrick’s demise is that he’s not cranky enough!
“The unofficial reason is that many party members felt that he might actually win.”
Howling Laud Hope has stood in more than two dozen elections in the 23 years he has been leader of his party.
Otherwise known as Alan Hope, he is currently a town councillor in Fleet in Hampshire and in June this year he celebrated his 80th birthday.
He most recently contested the North Shropshire by-election in December 2021.
Speaking to So Shropshire during that election, he said: “We are the party that’s on everybody’s side, no matter what political persuasion they may be.
“We have heard it all before, seen it all before, and still don’t believe it!”
He added: “If you don’t usually vote, vote unusually – vote for me!”
In September, The Official Monster Raving Loony Party held its annual party conference in Coalville in Leicestershire.
The venue was the Victoria Music Rooms, with the party claiming it was the first ever political party invited to hold their conference in ‘The House Of Commons’ (because the establishment is owned by Mr John Commons!)
In another first, the party also claimed to have been the first to hold a party conference during the reign of King Charles III.
The party’s policies – known as its ‘manicfesto’ – are listed alphabetically, below.
The Official Monster Raving Loony Party Manicfesto:
A. AIR bags will be fitted to the Stock Exchange immediately, ready for the next crash.
B. BRITAIN will exit Europe and join the Duchy of Cornwall to benefit from tax exemptions.
C. CAPITAL punishment will be opposed on the grounds that it is unfair to Londoners.
D. DATA will be secured, placed in a brown bag and hidden in the PM’s socks and pants drawer.
E. EDUCATION – all university tuition fees for women would be free as we are strong believers in female intuition. (Due to gender equality laws we would include males as well.)
F. FRIVOLOUS Fraud Office setup to inspect fraud too silly for the Serious Fraud Office.
G. GREYHOUND racing will be banned to prevent the country going to the dogs.
H. HALF the grey squirrels will be painted red to increase the red squirrel population.
I. INNOCENT prisoners will be released in order to reduce prison overcrowding.
J. JOBSEEKERS will be made to stand two abreast in order to halve dole queues.
K. KIDS will be made to sit closer together on smaller desks in to reduce school class sizes.
L. LONDON Marathon free to anyone finishing in sub-2 hours wearing large clown’s shoes.
M. MEGA carwash will be created by punching holes in the roof of the Channel Tunnel.
N. NATIONAL debt will be cleared by putting it all on our credit card.
O. OAPS will qualify for a Summer Ice Lolly Allowance if temperatures exceed 70 degrees.
P. PUDDLES deeper than 3 inches will be marked by a yellow plastic duck.
Q. QUITTERS will be encouraged not to start in the first place to improve their self esteem.
R. REGULATIONS concerning car boot sales will be relaxed to permit selling of all car parts.
S. STAMP duty will be cancelled as stamps are expensive enough without having to pay duty.
T. TERRORISTS will be made to wear Bells and Horns so we know where they are.
U. UNRULY teenagers will be superglued together as if you can’t beat them, join them.
V. VEHICLES will be fitted with bungy ropes in order to save fuel on the return journey.
W. WIND farms will be created nationwide, where breaking wind will be encouraged.
X. X-RAY machines will be manned by a skeleton staff.
Y. YELLOW lines will be painted where you can park instead of where you can’t to save money.
Z. ZEBRA crossings will be made permissible to all animals wishing to cross the road.
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